I have been unhappy in my marriage for years. This is because my husband maltreats me. Right from time, maybe because I did not go to school. I married him after my secondary school at age 17. My parents are not together and my mother cannot take care of six of us financially. I managed to finish secondary school and married my husband when he came to village to marry a wife.
When he met me, he said he wanted to marry a virgin but I was afraid to tell him I was not a virgin. It would have been a disgrace to my family and I really needed to marry cos there was no hope of anything. I truly wanted to further,so he promised my mother that he will sponsor my education if I marry him.
My husband discovered I was not a virgin after marriage and he was furious. But I begged him and lied to him that I was raped. I begged him not to disgrace our family cos no one will marry me if he sends me away. So he did not send me away but he never loved me from then on.
He would treat me like trash, insult me and only when he has the urge will he have s*x with me. Well, since I was not a virgin, he refused to send me to school. I started business of buying and selling okrika clothes from house keeping money. From there, I was saving, and promised myself, one day, I must go back to school.
My husband’s junior brother who is doing HND is living with us in boys quarter and he helps around with chores at home sometimes. When he saw how his brother was treating me, he took pity on me . The days his brother will insult me and call me names, ashawo, slut, useless woman, etc, his brother will be comforting me and telling me not to worry. I used to cry alot cos I was really unhappy with the inhuman treatment from my husband.
My husband used to travel for weeks and leave me and my three children. Even though he used to drop money for food, he made sure not to give me anything for myself. So, I had to work hard in my thrift business. I would not have made it without my husband’s junior brother. He really became a back bone for me. Helping me take care of the children and encouraging me emotionally.