Effects of couples not living together, by Pastor Wole Oladiyun

1. MARRIAGE IS GOD’S IDEA 
2. Gen. 2 v 18 – 25

v.18 “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.”

v.19 “And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every fowl of the air, and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.”

v.20 “And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam, there was not found a help meet for him.”

v.21 “And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;”

v.22 “And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.”

v.23 “And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man.”

v.24 “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”

v.25 “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”

BENEFITS OF MARRIAGE 

• Gen. 1 v 28

v.28 “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”

1. Companionship
2. Procreation
3. Sexual pleasure
4. Parenting
5. Love and Respect
6. Relationship
7. Lack of Loneliness
8. Provision (Security) and Support for each other
9. Character refining
10. Togetherness in general

STAYING APART AFTER MARRIAGE

It is important to state here that couples may live apart TEMPORARILY after marriage for the under listed reasons:

1. Study
2. Work transfer
3. Imprisonment
4. Abuse that is deadly
5. Health Challenges (need to Quarantine)

THE NEW VOGUE: COUPLES LIVING APART BY CHOICE

• Living apart is increasing and seen as a NEW & BETTER way for MODERN COUPLES to live.
• This malady in marriage is spreading like wild fire these days.
• It is making couples to do what they want in their own space within marriage.
• Economic Issue
• Better Education for their Children
• Better life for the family
• Undisclosed intention to be free to enjoy individual space uninterrupted.

BENEFITS OF LIVING TOGETHER AND DANGER OF LIVING APART

• Let us examine the benefits in married couples living together and the danger in living apart:
• Eccl. 4 v 9 – 12

v.9 “Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.”

v.10 “For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.”

v.11 “Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?”

v.12 “And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

1. Good reward for their labour.
2. One will lift up his or her fellow.
3. Woe to him that is alone.
4. When one falls, no one to help him up.
5. Two lying down have heat.
6. One cannot warm alone.
7. Two will prevail against any attacker.

DANGERS OF COUPLES LIVING APART

• 2 Tim. 3 v 16 & 17 (GNB)

v.16 “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful for teaching the truth, rebuking error, correcting faults, and giving instruction for right living.”

v.17 “so that the person who serves God may be fully qualified and equipped to do every kind of good deed.”

1. Emotional Interruption.
   1. Loneliness.
   1. Vacuum Created.
   1. Change in Lifestyle.
   1. Communication Interruption.
   1. Propensity to desire a new partner.
   1. Children upbringing imbalance.
   1. Children growing not knowing the other Partner.
   1. Children Development partially known.
   1. Propensity for Polygamy or Bigamy.
   1. Sexual Lifestyle interruption.
   1. Gradual emotional separation.
   1. Secret affairs/Cheating.
   1. Marital Breakdown.
   1. Eating pattern Interruption.
   1. Health/Wellness danger.
   1. Social Lifestyle disrupted.
   1. Gap created in Marriage.
   1. Financial Interruption.
   1. Anger/Tantrum triggered.
   1. Marital Joy depleting.
   1. No intimate encourager.
   1. Propensity for depression.
   1. No gist partner.
   1. Evolution of strange behavior.
   1. Extended family interruption.
   1. Anxiety/Panic development.
   1. Self Esteem tampered with.
   1. Coping Mechanism cracked.
   1. Insincerity development.
   1. Trust issue questioned.
   1. Divorce imminent.

MY CANDID ADVICE

• Prov. 27 v 12 (GNB)

“Sensible people will see trouble coming and avoid it, but an unthinking person will walk right into it and regret it later.”

1. Married couples should stay together.
2. Bear in mind that in your old age, companionship is germane. By that time, your children are gone to start their own family. No more energy to run around. Sexual pleasure depleted. You need each other.
3. The concept of “Baby Mama” and “Baby Father” is not of God. It is unwise.
4. Make the necessary adjustment today and save your tomorrow.

Visit our Family Life department or any Godly Family Life Academy where you are. Make hay while the sun shines.

Pastor Wole Oladiyun is the Senior Pastor of the Christ Livingspring Apostolic Ministry, Omole, Lagos, Nigeria. He can be reached via pastorclam@yahoo.com. Visit www.woleoladiyun.com, www.clamgo.org, or www.prayerparliament.com to access more prayer bulletins and his books.