If a woman wants to be happy in her 40s and beyond, say goodbye to these 9 behaviours

There’s a fine line between living happily and living with regrets, especially as we mature.

In essence, it’s about choices. Shedding certain behaviours is like saying goodbye to self-imposed constraints that keep us from flourishing.

As a woman stepping into her 40s and beyond, choosing to let go of these habits allows you to embrace your true potential and happiness.

And believe me, there are some behaviours we need to kick to the curb. Lucky for you, I’ve identified 9 of them that we’ll be saying goodbye to for a more fulfilling life.

Let’s get started.

1) Seeking approval from others

There’s no arena where self-confidence matters more than in our personal lives.

We’ve all experienced the pull of external validation at some point. As women, especially, societal pressures can often lead us to seek approval from others.

But here’s the thing – when you hit your 40s and beyond, you start realizing that this persistent need for validation can be emotionally draining and counterproductive to your happiness.

This concept of external approval has its roots deep in our psyche. It’s the reason behind our constant social media scrolling, our anxiety when we don’t get enough ‘likes’, and our incessant need to fit into societal norms.

When a woman finds herself at the crossroads of multiple life choices, she often leans on the approval of others to make her decision. It’s an emotional crutch that can prove detrimental in the long run.

2) Comparing yourself to others

Let’s talk about the comparison trap.

I remember a time in my life when I was constantly measuring myself against others. Whether it was my friend’s successful career, my neighbour’s perfect family, or a stranger’s fit physique on Instagram – I was always in comparison mode.

But as I ventured into my 40s, I realised something crucial – this constant comparison was not only draining but also stealing my joy.

My 40s taught me that everyone is on their own unique journey with its own set of challenges and triumphs. Comparing our path to someone else’s only breeds discontent and insecurity.

3) Neglecting self-care

In a world that’s always on the go, it’s easy to forget to take care of ourselves. The demands of work, family, and life in general can sometimes leave us feeling like there’s no time for self-care.

But here’s something you might not know: The World Health Organization recognizes self-care as a vital part of maintaining good health and preventing disease.

When you hit your 40s and beyond, self-care takes on even more significance. It’s not just about the occasional spa day or indulging in a favourite treat. It encompasses healthy eating, regular exercise, adequate sleep, and mental wellness practices like meditation or mindfulness.

4) Fearing change

Change is a natural part of life. As we age, we encounter numerous changes – in our bodies, our careers, our relationships, and our circumstances. Yet, many of us fear change and resist it.

But here’s the thing about change: it’s often the catalyst for growth and new beginnings. Change pushes us out of our comfort zones and challenges us in ways we never imagined.

As a woman in her 40s and beyond, fearing change can hold you back from exploring new opportunities and experiences that could bring you happiness.

It’s time to say goodbye to this fear of change. Embrace the uncertainty and unpredictability that come with change. It may be uncomfortable at first, but it can lead to beautiful transformations and a more fulfilling life.

5) Holding on to grudges

Let’s talk about grudges. We all have them, those old hurts and resentments that we carry around like heavy baggage.

Holding on to grudges can be emotionally exhausting. It keeps our past mistakes and hurts in the forefront of our minds, preventing us from fully enjoying the present.

As a woman stepping into her 40s and beyond, releasing these grudges can be incredibly liberating. It allows us to let go of negativity and make room for positivity and peace.

It’s time to let go of those grudges. It’s not about forgetting or condoning what happened, but about choosing not to let past hurts dictate your present happiness.

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It lightens your emotional load and paves the way for happiness in your 40s and beyond.

6) Ignoring your intuition

Some call it a gut feeling, others refer to it as the inner voice. It’s our intuition, and it’s one of the most powerful tools we have for guiding us in life.

Ignoring our intuition is like silencing our own personal compass. It’s that little voice inside us that knows what’s best for us, even when our mind is clouded with doubts.

In our 40s and beyond, life can get complicated. There are tough decisions to be made and sometimes, the right choice isn’t always clear. That’s where our intuition comes in.

Let’s make a pact to stop ignoring our intuition. Let’s give it the attention it deserves and trust it to guide us towards our happiness. After all, nobody knows what’s best for us better than we do.

7) Being too hard on yourself

I’ve found that in the pursuit of perfection, I’ve often been my own harshest critic. Whether it was about my work, my parenting, or even the way I looked – I always found something to critique.

But with time, I’ve learned that this relentless self-criticism only brought me down. It prevented me from appreciating my achievements and celebrating my strengths.

As women in our 40s and beyond, we need to understand that it’s okay not to be perfect. It’s okay to have flaws and make mistakes. That’s what makes us human.

8) Living in the past

We all have a past, filled with memories, experiences, and lessons. However, dwelling in the past can hold us back from fully experiencing the present and planning for the future.

Living in the past often means holding on to old regrets, past mistakes, or nostalgic memories. This can keep us stuck, unable to move forward and embrace new opportunities.

As we step into our 40s and beyond, it’s important to learn from our past but not let it dictate our present or future.

Because happiness is often found in the here and now, not in yesterday.

9) Neglecting your passions

Life is too short to not do what you love. Each one of us has unique passions and interests that bring us joy and fulfillment. Neglecting these passions can often lead to dissatisfaction and a sense of unfulfillment.

As we venture into our 40s and beyond, it’s crucial to make time for what we love. Whether it’s painting, gardening, writing, or even baking, indulging in our passions brings us immense happiness.

So here’s the most important thing you should know: Never sideline your passions. They are the essence of who you are and what makes you come alive. So embrace them, nurture them, and let them guide you towards your true happiness.

Final reflections: A journey of self-love

Consider the words of renowned psychotherapist and author, Virginia Satir: “We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us.” At the heart of this journey lies the willingness to let go of behaviors that no longer serve us and embrace those that foster growth and happiness.

Whether it’s releasing grudges, trusting our intuition, or nurturing our passions, each step contributes to a deeper sense of fulfillment.

But remember, change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process, a journey filled with small victories and setbacks.

And as you step into this journey, know this – you’re not alone. Across the world, there are countless women navigating their 40s and beyond, just like you. We’re all in this together.

Geediting