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The easiest and common sign to identify women truly in love is their inquisitive and attention seeking tendencies. There’s a positive dimension to this trait in them. When they call at intervals to “check on you” or find out if you have “eaten” or to know updates on your activities, they are expressly demonstrating love and not feeling insecure or monitoring. In this wise, they usually sound tender, caring and naturally romantic. That’s the best a man could get from his “Queen.”

This same trait could become a stress on the relationship when it is negatively applied. Women are not known to be diplomatic when things get on her nerves. They don’t moderate their utterances under pressure or when confronted with consistent provocation. When irritated or dared, they burst like a pipe gushing its water under pressure. At this period, men need to be calm. The Queen has transmuted to a weird matriarch or an intemperate “Margaret Thatcher.” This happens when she is stretched to her elastic limit. She likes to see a change with the speed of light but it’s not happening. She craves for something satisfactory and emotionally soothing but she’s not getting it, hence she screams, nags and complains most of the time. But when she starts keeping quiet and ignoring her dislikes, she might be planning to effect a change; and that could be unpredictably painful, regrettable and ultimately disastrous.

Women don’t cheat or double deal in their relationships, they simply replace. The secret is that most women involved in extramarital affairs don’t just cheat, they replace their men in their hearts and consciousness with whoever they choose to date.

Women are the most complex beings to deal with. They could be extremely wonderful, supportive and protective. Women could withstand opposition in defense of their men. They could fight battles and sacrifice for their men willingly. Women are ready to severe relationship with their family and friends in defense of their men. Their level of sacrifice and commitment is unquantifiable.

In 1994, an artiste wanted to embark on money ritual. He was popular but living in poverty. His fame was not commensurate with his financial worth. He decided to do money ritual but the witch doctor asked him to bring the pubic hairs of his wife. He opened up to his wife about his plan and the requirement for it. To his surprise, she volunteered to offer her pubic hairs but pleaded that he should not maltreat her children and keep her in an hygienic environment knowing that she would have lost her senses as an invalid. She also pleaded that the new wife he would marry should not be allowed to harm her children. If her husband agreed to those simple conditions, she was ready to sacrifice herself for the good of her family. Her response rattled the man. To show that she actually meant what she said, she shaved her private parts and handed over the hairs to him in a nylon. That was how the man discarded the idea. Today, both of them are still alive and their situation has improved tremendously.

As sacrificial and supportive a woman could be, likewise she could be as deadly and destructive as death. King Solomon the Wise wrote in Ecclesiastes 7: 26 that he “found (sly, bitter, vindictive and vengeful) women more bitter than death.” Most of the challenges men face have connections with women. And conversely, women see men as their major source of problems, too. While the later may not always involve deep-seated bitterness and spiritual machination or manipulation, women could operate from both physical and spiritual flanks. May God touch their hearts so they could be lenient with their erring men. Amen.

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