Have you ever felt like someone in your life is just a bit too wrapped up in themselves?
In an era dominated by self-promotion and vanity, if you’re dealing with one, it’s tough to make them understand it’s not all about them.
More often than not, people mistake your frustration for intolerance, when you’re really just overwhelmed by their self-centeredness.
In fact, you’ve probably been called intolerant more times than you’d like to remember.
Does this sound familiar?
If it does, continue reading about the 10 signs you’re dealing with a deeply self-centered person, according to psychology.
1) Conversations are always about them
A clear indication that you’re dealing with a self-centered person is if conversations always revolve around them.
You know, it feels like they start the dialogue toward their interests, achievements, or problems.
And this usually makes you feel like a mere sounding board.
Let’s face it: this incessant need to be the center of attention not only drains you but also makes your interactions one-sided and unfulfilling.
Unfortunately, their constant self-focus can often be mistaken for confidence or charisma.
But understand that there’s a vast difference between self-assuredness and self-absorption.
While it’s healthy to express oneself, a balanced conversation should involve an equal exchange of thoughts and ideas.
2) They rarely show empathy
Another sign that you’re dealing with a self-centered person is their lack of empathy.
I remember a friend I had who was always full of energy and could light up a room with her stories.
But when it came to listening to others, she’d switch off completely.
Once I was going through a tough phase at work. I was stressed, sleep-deprived, and needed someone to share my concerns with.
When I tried to explain my situation to my friend, she simply brushed it off saying, “Well, at least you have a job.”
She then proceeded to talk about her recent vacation, entirely disregarding my feelings.
Sounds like your friends?
Well, self-centered individuals often fail to understand or acknowledge the feelings and perspectives of others.
Although they do listen sometimes, they don’t truly hear you or empathize with your situation.
3) They have a strong sense of entitlement
Self-centered individuals often exhibit a strong sense of entitlement. They believe they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.
This can be traced back to a psychological perspective known as the “self-serving bias“.
According to this theory, individuals tend to perceive themselves in an overly favorable manner.
Such individuals are likely to attribute their achievements to their own abilities and efforts, while blaming outside factors for their failures or shortcomings.
This strong sense of entitlement can lead them to demand special treatment, disregard rules, or overlook the needs and feelings of others.
That’s why you should remember one thing:
Respect and consideration for others are key components of healthy relationships and social interactions.
4) They are often controlling
Now, let me focus on one of the less obvious signs of a self-centered person: their tendency to be controlling.
The truth is that these people often believe that their way is the best and only way.
And, of course, they want things to go exactly as they planned.
Consequently, these individuals dictate how you spend your time, who you interact with, or how you should feel about certain situations.
And you know what?
They don’t even realize they’re doing it because they’re so wrapped up in their own world.
So, here’s the deal:
If you find yourself feeling constricted, manipulated, or constantly trying to meet someone else’s standards, it’s likely you’re dealing with a deeply self-centered person.
It’s crucial to maintain your individuality and personal freedom in any relationship.
5) They are rarely genuinely happy for others
I know this one hurts, but it’s an undeniable truth.
A self-centered person struggles to feel genuine happiness for others.
Whether it’s your promotion, a new relationship, or even a small win, their initial reaction might be either
- Spite rather than joy
Look, I’m not saying that they won’t congratulate.
But if they do, it will be half-hearted or worse — they’ll quickly change the subject back to themselves.
The thing is that their inability to share your joy reflects their focus on their own feelings and desires.
It’s painful to realize that someone you care about can’t share in your happiness.
But understand that it’s not a reflection of your achievements or worth.
6) They struggle with genuine apologies
One more irritating tendency of self-centered individuals is that they have a hard time saying “I’m sorry” and meaning it.
It’s not because they’re bad people. Not at all.
Instead, admitting they’re wrong would mean shifting the focus from themselves and acknowledging someone else’s feelings or perspective.
As a result, they might skirt around the issue, offer excuses, or even twist the situation to make it seem like you’re overreacting.
Simply because they struggle to accept responsibility for their actions or to understand how they’ve hurt you.
However, everyone has the potential for growth and change.
Sometimes, it takes patience for someone to recognize their self-centered tendencies and work towards becoming more empathetic.
7) They constantly seek validation
Ever found yourself in situations where you’re forced to dish out compliments or affirmations just to keep the peace?
If so, you might be dealing with a self-centered person.
After all, these individuals constantly seek validation and reassurance from others.
You see, they crave attention and approval like we crave our morning coffee.
In simple terms, it’s their way of maintaining a positive self-image and feeling good about themselves.
And let’s be honest, we’ve all been there, needing a little ego boost from time to time.
But when it becomes a consistent pattern, it can feel exhausting and one-sided.
8) They have a flair for the dramatic
Have toy noticed how some people have a tendency to turn even the smallest incident into a full-blown soap opera?
Well again, you might just be dealing with a self-centered person.
These individuals often thrive on drama. They love being the main character, whether that means playing the hero, the victim, or even the villain.
It’s all about keeping the spotlight firmly on them.
Therefore, life with them can be like living in a constant reality TV show.
There’s always some drama unfolding, some crisis to be resolved, or some victory to be celebrated – and they’re always at the center of it all.
9) They seldom show gratitude
Individuals deeply entrenched in self-centeredness often overlook the art of expressing gratitude.
However, this isn’t just about saying ‘thank you’ for a favor — it’s a consistent inability to recognize and appreciate the efforts of others.
Interestingly, studies show that expressing gratitude can actually change the neural structures in the brain.
Specifically, gratitude boosts dopamine and serotonin and enhances our mood instantly.
As a result, we feel happier and more content.
Yet, self-centered people miss out on these benefits.
They tend to focus on what they didn’t get or how others haven’t met their expectations, rather than appreciating what they have received.
This lack of gratitude not only impacts their mood and well-being but can also strain relationships, as others may feel unappreciated.
10) They lack self-awareness
Finally, the hallmark of a deeply self-centered person is a notable lack of self-awareness.
They often fail to see the impact of their actions on others or understand how they are perceived.
But here’s something for all of us to consider:
Could there be moments when we, too, exhibit a lack of self-awareness?
Maybe it’s not about always being perfect but about being open to reflection and growth.
Think about it:
Have there been times when you were so focused on your own needs or viewpoints that you overlooked someone else’s feelings or contributions?
Self-awareness is a journey, and recognizing our own occasional lapses can help us cultivate empathy and understanding toward others
As you can see, dealing with a self-centered person can be challenging. You might feel unheard, unappreciated, or even manipulated.
However, remember that it’s not always about changing the other person—sometimes, it’s about understanding their behavior and how it impacts you.
If you’ve identified a self-centered person in your life, don’t lose heart—understanding their behavior can empower you to manage your interactions better and protect your emotional health.
Remember, everyone has the capacity for change and growth.
While it’s not your responsibility to change someone else, being aware of these signs can help foster healthier conversations and relationships.
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