I felt drawn to him…I really thought I was being a good friend…and I allowed him to k!$$ me and make love to me. I was a fool. He used his vulnerability to get to me. After making love, he even asked me if he satisfied me…wanted to prove that he was man enough…I told him he lied cos there is nothing wrong with him s8xua||y.
If anything, he is quite very active s8xua||y and any woman would be out of her mind to say otherwise. He said he just wanted to be sure he is alright cos his wife keeps berating him and saying he cannot perform. He started to apologize to me but truly…I cannot say he forced me…more like taking advantage of my sincere concern and care for him.
I asked him to leave and forget this ever happened. I felt terrible. I have never cheated on anyone in my life. And all I could think of was my fiance….how I betrayed him but I told myself it was a mistake…I was only trying to help someone dear to the family. I tried to focus on work but my fiance’s sister’s husband kept calling me all day. Saying he needs to see me. I had to block his line.
Two days later, he was waiting for me at the hotel that night when I returned. I told him to leave me and he promised to leave me after I hear him out. We sat in the lobby and he told me that he cannot stop thinking about me and he really wants to thank me for giving him back his confidence. That he told his wife that he wants a divorce.
This man wants me to leave my fiance cos he feels their family is cursed. He then exposed my fiance…that he cheated on me last year and his family covered it up. That last year, when they had a family easter re-union, my fiance came with a woman that stayed with him for two days and no one told me. He said that they are not faithful people in relationships or marriage and make you feel like you are the one that made them cheat. He warned me not to marry my fiance cos he will cheat on me…I told him thank you and asked him to leave.
Since then, I battled with my decision to either confront my fiance or not. I also feel terrible for cheating on him and his sister’s husband has not stopped trying to contact me…telling me how he wants me and he has discovered he is in love with me. This is crazy. I also try not to but I think about this man sometimes and I know I shouldn’t.
Because I couldn’t take this anymore, I prayed about this…and when I returned to Lagos…I broke up with my Fiance. The guilt and secrets were too much to bear. So, I confronted him and asked him about the secret woman he took to his family house the last easter. He denied it but when I told him it’s over…he said the woman was only an old friend who came to hang out with them.
So, my fiance is lying. He got angry and asked who told me. He figured his sister’s husband did and he challenged that one, accusing him of trying to break us up because he can’t keep his marriage to his sister that is falling apart. My fiance has been begging me to forgive and I wish I can forgive but imagine that I forgive him and one day he finds out that I also cheated on him with his sister’s husband?
I feel this is the best thing to do…walk away but he and his family and mine are all pleading. But I feel like the foundation is broken. He cheated…I cheated…but he has no idea I cheated but I was only trying to help his brother-in-law…but the brother-in-law says my secret is safe cos he is leaving his wife after realizing that she was only dehumanizing him just to keep cheating on him.
Does that mean that the coast is clear for me now? Should I consider going back to my fiance or have I crossed that line of no return? I mean…I can forgive him for cheating…if he promises to remain faithful but will he forgive me if he knows I was not faithful to him? I love my fiance but is there any hope for us or this is the end of our future?
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